A BIG EMPTY HOUSE

                               

   A BIG EMPTY HOUSE

One of my friends (by the way, a good friend, or he would not have asked me a question like that.) asked what it was like to live in a big old empty house?

The first thought that came to my mind was, "that is a rude question." However after thinking about it for a few minutes I decided it was not rude at all and he was trying to help me "cope".

So what is it like to live in a big empty house? I don't know because I do not live in a Big nor an Empty house.

When the last of our children moved out a mysterious wall hanging showed up on our wall. It said,

"The Empty Nesters" by Helen Bush, 1995 

Although I do not know her I loved some of the things she said:

"Yes our children are all grown up; they don't live here anymore,

But we didn't just stop living, when they walked out of our door."

Then she indicated her little girls had become women (just like ours did.) and thier little boy became a man (also just like ours did.) Then she states a very profound thought, "We thought it over wisely, and we happily have found, that our nest is hardly empty- we two old birds are still around."

When my wife passed on there was again a change in our home.

Yes I felt alone. It was different than when our children left. I indeed was alone, not in a big house like my friend asked about, but it did feel a lot bigger than it did when there were two of us.

After what seemed like the longest 4 or 5 months in my life I come to the realization that our home was not empty! I started cleaning out: I threw things out, gave things away and put some aside for future evaluation (whatever that means?)

At that point things started to change. I laughed when I found a bag of M&M's in the bottom of one of Donnie's sewing bags, and I think she was right there laughing with me. Cleaning out one of her dresser drawers was an experience-- I found things that had completely left my memory bank, if it was ever there? There were Boy Scout pins, Duty to God pins that were given to Mothers, a ribbon from some school event he had won. There were refrigerator hangings and magnet to hold them, Award pins she had received at work, several watches and stuff that I would never imagine she would have saved.

NO THIS HOUSE IS NOT EMPTY-- It is full of treasures just waiting to be found.

As the months went on and I kept moving things around, laughing and giggling at times, I thought to myself, "yup, she is right there laughing with me."

Each time I move something I know for sure this old house is not empty. I move a stack of Christmas CD's and I remember how we like to listen to them. A group of stuffed animals-mostly given to Donnie by her Grand Kids. A dresser drawer full of perfume and lotions (which I don't think I will ever use, Ha Ha. Yes and every once in a while I run onto another "stash" of minature chocolate bars in the bottom of a bag, a drawer or a storage box full of stuff!

No this home is not EMPTY. My children come and visit & we talk about the good old days-- My grandchildren come and visit and I TELL them stories about the good old days. And now I have four great grandchildren (and one more next month), and Yes I hope to tell them stories about the good old days, even if they DO NOT know what I am talking about, and maybe I don't either??

This Old Family Home is not empty--- yes there is only one person living here, but the feelings and the memories will be here as long as I am--------

The picture at the top is just to show how Donnie loved to get together with friends and family for any reason she could think of!

W.R. BALDWIN -Feb 2015